Nightmare. It’s been a cold night and your car is covered in a coating of frost. You need to get it cleared before you drive away, and there’s a right way and a wrong way to do it.
The wrong, way, incidentally, is to clear a tiny letterbox shape on the windshield and try to drive while you’re peering through this tiny gap. We’ve seen this done and we bet you have too, and it’s so dangerous that we’re not even going to try to make a joke about it.
01 Coat (check), gloves (check), smartphone (er… check?)
Leave your cappuccino in the kitchen (yes, really), but bring your smartphone. Yup, life is tough, but we can do this. You’re going to be out in the cold for a few minutes so make sure you wear some warm clothing. You weren’t thinking of tiptoeing out in your slippers and dressing gown, starting the engine and tiptoeing back to your warm kitchen, were you? We need to get this straight RIGHT AT THE START.
02 Engine on, HVAC enabled
HVAC is heating, ventilation and air conditioning, and there is some science in getting this right. First, put the fan on full power. The faster the air moves, the quicker the necessary heat and moisture transfers take place. It doesn’t matter that the motor hasn’t had time to warm up yet.
Now set the heater on full because the temperature of the air coming through will be climbing imperceptibly even while your teeth are still chattering. The sooner you’re circulating warm(er) air, the better.
So now set the vent control to windshield/demist. Remember, this isn’t about you any more – it’s about making your windows happy. If your car has aircon, switch it on because it helps to remove moisture from the air – and condensation is going to be your next problem. Switch on the rear window demist and front windshield heater if you have one.
03 Start scraping
While your engine is building heat and your HVAC system is circulating the air, get out, shut the door to keep the heat in, and use a proper scraper to start shifting the snow or frost. If it’s frozen hard, don’t use force – windshield glass is hard, but you can still scratch it. Refrozen water ice can’t be cleared that easily, and you’re going to need get back in and leave the heater to do its work for a little longer.
04 Hunker down, check your emails
Or Facebook, or Twitter, or your favourite news site – all the stuff you would have done in the kitchen over that cappuccino. We told you you’d need your smartphone.
Seriously, do not leave your car with the keys in the ignition and the engine running – you’re just asking to have it stolen. What you may not know is that (a) your insurance will almost certainly be invalidated and (b) in the UK at least, it is technically against the law not to be in control of your vehicle if the engine is running.
While you’re waiting you can email the boss to say you’ll be late, or check to see if your train is on time or, if you must, play some dumb candy saga game.
05 Bad luck about that cappuccino
As your car warms up and the frost melts away, you’ll notice condensation building up on the inside. That’s because the warmer air inside holds more moisture given off by damp clothing, for example, and your own breath. It will clear but it may take a couple of minutes. What you do not need at this point is a steaming mug of coffee adding to your condensation problems. Sorry.